Prolly not F$U's Athletic Department's greatest I-deer!==============================

"Jameis, you went 13-0 on the football field and 2-0 in the court system. What are you more thankful for?"

"Which was tougher to get by? The Auburn defense or the Publix employees?"

"Do you look back and regret not stealing lunch meat and cheese as well?"

"How do you say 'not guilty' in Ebonics?"

"Did you give your teachers the eye squint when asked to read a paragraph aloud in class?"

"How do you prefer your crabs? Stolen or from the girl you raped?"

"Who is reading all of these big words to you?"

"What were the crab legs wearing when you stole them without consent?"

"Did the crabs say no to you too?"

"If your team had gone 8-4, would you be in jail now?"

"Which NFL player do you aspire to be like - Ray Rice, Michael Vick, Ray Lewis or Ben Roethlissberger?"