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gatorpower
(70.164.72.27) on 11/10/2010 - 12:34 p.m. says: ( 271 views
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"UNOFFICIAL: Coach Meyer Confirms He Started Allegations." |
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CONTEXT ADDED BY ADMIN: END OF CONTEXT You idiot. You bumbling, fast-food eating, spinach-growing bumpkin. You watch too much television. You watch too many movies. You need to stop watching TMZ. You need to stop watching Independence Day, where the President of the United States himself, Thomas J. Whitmore, played by Bill Pullman, straps into an F-18 fighter jet and dogfights with alien spaceships. The head of your local ‘evil’ drug syndicate is probably not going to know karate; and even if he did, he is not going to be the absolute best karate fighter in his organization of thugs. The head of a multinational bank is not going to tote around guns, stalking the sweet, but lovable librarian ex-girlfriend of his who overheard a conversation about nuclear missiles. You need to evolve past the preschool level logic and reasoning skills you currently wallow in and start to develop a repository of real-life plausibilities. Life is boring, but its more complex than M. Night Shyamalan film. In real life, sometimes the extras pull off the biggest plot twists. Who killed Mr. Boddy with the candlestick in the library? If you said the head of the UN security council, you are an idiot. I have no faith in you to do anything other than pour yesterday's leftovers onto plates at an elementary school cafeteria. You actually believe the things with the most impact are perpetrated by the largest name on the marquee? What an absolute moron you are. That's right, in addition to delegating responsibilities after a health scare, tirelessly reworking his spread offense after a dismal three-loss season, motivating his team to beat the team that beat Alabama, the head coach of our football team, Urban Meyer, found time in his schedule and would risk his reputation to dress in a trench coat, oversized sunglasses and a fedora, and wait in the shadows at the Stephen C. O'Connell Center Parking Garage at 3:30 in the morning to spill his guts to a nobody reporter about a former player in a move that has absolutely no positive impact for the Gators at all. And you idiots believe it. Do you also envision him smoking a fine cuban cigar and speaking in a 1920s gangster accent? “Can't let him with the Heisman, Sheee. Gotta get the media attention off me, Sheee” And, as is typical with these academic scandals, all the information is filtered through the athletic department, specifically, the highest-profile member of said department. Professors report directly to Urban Meyer. Then he killed everyone else who might have known, including the professors. Here is an interesting fact for your Aubbies. The student who allegedly had his work stolen was named Michael Henderson. Google it yourself. He was found dead in his car 4 weeks later, his throat slit, ear-to-ear and the head of a dead rabbit on the seat next to him. Police suspected foul play, but further inquiry has turned up nothing. Urban Meyer is the f***ing Mafia Don at the University of Florida. He owns this city. In fact, the NCAA clearing house also reports directly to our Don, if you want to believe Patrick Peterson, who had his ACT test flagged by Coach Meyer, himself, after he had a 30% increase in a test he took 3 hours away from his hometown. You f*** with Urban, you get hit with almost tedious, non-criminal scandals. Meyer has a briefcase filled with these little playing cards to his at his discretion, so he can bring down mountains and mighty men. He has an ace in his pocket to use against Tim Tebow one day: “April 24th, 2008: Caught Tebow kissing a girl between her cleavage. Ha! Try selling your book now Timy! I got you!” Something happens within the Gainesville City limits. OMG!! Urban Meyer. Do you have any idea how stupid and inbred you people sound? This just in, domestic battery case reported in small town 5 miles outside Auburn, Alabama, Gene Chizik sought for questioning. |
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UNOFFICIAL: Coach Meyer Confirms He Started Allegations. gatorpower 11/10/2010 - 12:34 p.m. |
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