I was able to obtain recordings of Jeremy Foley's phone conversations over the last week or two.  Here are transcripts of some of the more interesting ones:

Jeremy Foley and Jimmy Sexton

JF: Jimmy, it’s Jeremy Foley.  How are ya?

JS: CHA-CHING!!

JF: HaHa, that’s funny.  Listen, Jimmy –

JS: CHA-CHING!! CHA-CHING!! 

JF: You’re a crazy guy.  Hey I’d like to talk about a couple of your clients, Jimmy.

JS: CHA-CHING!!

JF: Yeah, I get it already.  Listen, I know you represent Sumlin and-

JS: CHA-CHING!!

JF: #$%@&* Moron! (Slams phone down)

Jeremy Foley and Bob Stoops

JF: Stoopsy it’s Jer-Jer.

BS: Uh, no comment.

JF: Huh?

BS: I love being the coach at OU and have no interest in any other coaching positions.

JF: Dude, it’s Jer-Jer.  I just wanna chat – cut the PR crap.

BS: My focus is on a bowl game and the young men that represent our fine institution.

JF: Whatever.

BS: (in a whisper) Dude, I just built a huge house for my wife … and have you seen my contract?  I’m not sure even Florida could buy me out.  Plus these inbred Okies would chase me to Crescent Beach and slit my throat while I’m sleeping.  Sorry Jer-Jer, but it ain’t happening.

JF: #$%^@#$

Jeremy Foley and Randy Shannon

JF: Coach Shannon?  Hi, it’s Jeremy Foley, Athletic Director at the University of Florida.

RS: (silence)

JF: Coach Shannon?

RS: M-m-m-mister Foley?  F-f-f-from UF?  Really?

JF: That’s right, Coach.  I’d like to discuss our coaching opportunity with you.

RS: R-r-r-really?  With me?

JF: HAHAHAHA! PSYCHE!!!! (Slams phone down)

Jeremy Foley and Donna D

JF: Hi Donna, it’s Jeremy.

DD: Hi Jeremy.  What’s up?

JF: Confidentially Donna I need some help on this coaching search.  What are the folks on the VS saying?

DD: You really want to know?

JF: Yes.

DD: Well, they’re saying you’d better not hire some wannabe with no head coaching experience.  They say that we’re Florida and we deserve only the best.  They say it’s one of the top three coaching jobs in America and you’d better be talking to Stoops, Gruden, Cowher, Petersen, Patterson, and Sumlin at a minimum.

JF: (Gulp)

DD: Jeremy?

JF: Thanks Donna.

Jeremy Foley and Will Muschamp

JF: Hi Will, it’s Jeremy Foley from the University of Florida.  How are you?

WM: #$%$#@@^ … Florida?  As in Gators?

JF: HaHa, yeah I know it’s kind of a shock but I’d like to discuss our head coaching position with you.

WM: @#$#$%@#$ … Florida?  Really?

JF: Really.  I’d like to fly out to Austin and chat with, you know, gauge your interest and see if we have a match.

WM: !#%^$#%#$ … THE FLORIDA F%@#ING GATORS???

JF: Uh, yeah.  The Florida Gators.  Are you interested?

WM: Holy #%$%! What the #@$% do you think?  I’m the dumba$$ assistant coach sitting behind Mack Brown who, by the way, doesn’t seem to know his a$$ from a hole in the ground.  You think I wouldn’t jump at the chance to coach THE FLORIDA F%@#ING GATORS??

JF: Great!  I’ll fly out to talk with you tomorrow.  Clear your calendar.  And Coach … you might want to work on cleaning up your language.

WM: Golly Gee, Jeremy, that will be no problem at all.  I’ll do every gosh-darned thing I can to earn your respect and confidence. (Hand over receiver) Honey!  It’s THE FLORIDA F%@#ING GATORS! DO YOU BELIEVE THAT S%#@?

JF: See you tomorrow, Will.

WM: Damn straight!

Jeremy Foley and Cecil Newton

JF: (voice muffled) Mr. Newton? This is Mike Bianchi of the Orlando Sentinel. How are you?

CN: How did you get this number?

JF: From a friend. Listen, just a quick question on logistics. No questions on money or conspiracies or anything like that. Okay?

CN: Well ... I don't know.  What's the question?

JF: Does Cam have any awards show scheduled for Tuesday at 6:30?

CN: You lying !@#$#$@#!!! This is Jeremy Foley, isn't it?  You son-of-a-#@%^&! (Slams phone down)