I woke up this morning dreading the day.  Seems I had another meeting with this lawyer and his wannabe rapist client.  The last time we meet he tried to smash my hand on the initial handshake to try to make an impression and to feel me up.  You know all we are trying to do here is keep the bad guys on the inside of the bars and not allow those on the outside of the bars to act improperly.

His client comes in with him all tatted up with white power tattoos and a spiked collar around his neck.  His Hitler type mustache has booggers in it.  I mean he was gross.  Mr. Slick lawyer is wearing some cheap fake Armani suit and rattlesnake skin cowboy boots. 

First thing Mr. Slick does is sit down and prop his boots up on my desk and tell me what this interview is going to be about.  I asked his client’s name and Mr. Slick jumps up like a rabbit and screams, I object to this whole line of questioning.  I replied, “what are you talking about.”  I say the interview is over and he replies, “was it over when the German’s bombed Pearl Harbor?”  Then goes on to say when we get before jury, “I am going to get medieval on your ass, Ms Warden.  When he said that my garter belt snapped and pulled up my short plaid skirt.  You should have seen his eyes.  He grabbed for my firm 36 inch breasts and that is when the guards took him down and carried him out.

Today I wore tight fitting grey pants and a cashmere sweater over a silk top that barely covered my breasts.  I also wore my 8 inch heals that made my rear elevate and pout.  Mr. Slick came in today wearing flip flops, a tartan kilt and wool shirt.  His client today was a female guard who we caught having sex with the offset printing machine while inmates watched.  He reached out to shake my hand and I felt him trying to move from my hand to my firm, large breasts.  It was all I could do to squeeze his hand and keep him off me.  Sure enough when I turned around to get the file from my credenza, he came up behind me… Thank god for the tazers.  He started yelling Don’t taze me bro!  He must have been on meth because it took three shots to subdue him.  He then started yelling some about you fooled ‘em Chief”  I want some Juicy Fruit.  Good thing the whole thing is on tape.  I am sure the Alabama bar will enjoy the video.