. . . last year I was unsuccessful, a loser in life, and embarrased to be associated with Auburn because we were 3-8 and therefore I was less of a human being. You see, my self-worth is tied to the success of my football team, a collection of 18-23 year old kids with an average IQ probably south of 100 and a coaching staff that used to be players with guess what, and average IQ less than the average on this board. That is it. I have convinced myself that if AU loses then I am a lesser man and I will have no other response but to act irrationally and lash out at people, cause well I am a winner but my team has let me down.

Those neanderthals that pull for Bammer are clearly more successful than me 'cause their team has been wildly successful as of late. Their self-worth is off the charts. They are certainly to be admired in their homes and their communities. They are winners in life, all because they wear a $15 Bammer hat.