...in a seminar on the Civil War I am taking (I am a grad student working in American History)

Debate became a "chicken or the egg" view, which came first: racism or slavery, or did they happen at the same time. Most seemed to argue that after the Dutch captain showed up with a couple of dozen captured Africans at Jamestown in 1619, and once those who used these slaves in the British colony of Virginia realized how profitable this system could be, then an ignorant and false racist view of black Africans was deployed to justify slavery and for growing the system.

Here is a great book that guided our discussion last night: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0809015544/102-3929570-5152112?v=glance

It is a bit heavy academically, but situates American slavery in context with Caribbean slavery, Brazilian slavery, and Russian serfdom.

Now, as far as slave-owners loving their slaves or slaves loving their owners, this is a topic historians love to dodge, especially the concept known as Paternalism. Historians do not seem to know what to do with first hand accounts they come across when doing research on slavery where an owner expresses concern, love, or affection for a slave or slaves they own…or vice versa.

The fact of the matter is that human relationships are complicated and complex, especially the slave/slave-owner relationship. So, we can find ample examples of slaves loving & hating their owners, owners loving & hating their slaves, and of course brutalization that often characterized the system.

I would say though when we find evidence of slave and owner expressing love and affection to each other, it's still important to keep our eye on the ball and remember that they are still human property without rights, which is immoral regardless of how good or brutal their treatment proved to be....